Thoughts About the Haters

The Saint and I have been truly impressed with how well family, friends and total strangers have reacted to the news that we are starting a family. We expected a lot of resistance and tsk-tsking but folks have been very open and accepting.

Well, most people have been good.

Of course, we have heard stories of negative reactions from some friends and family. (Funny how none of them have the guts to say it to our face.) It has been the run of the mill kind of stuff that we expected but it still irritates me how incredibly stupid people can be! Seriously, people, did you not see The Kids Are All Right? last year? This should not be a shocking turn of events.

Here are some of my favorites:

Those poor boys won't have a male role model without a father. (Right. Because we don't know any men. By the way, when was the last time you saw your kids? Oh, that's right - they hate you because you were never around for them. I wanted to call and point out the irony to you but I am willing to bet you don't know what the word means.)

They will probably turn out gay, too. (Hooray for us if they do! I will finally have someone to help me pick out jeans that are actually comfortable and flattering. And our home will be stunning and meticulous. Perhaps our parents or the millions of other straight parents who raised gay kids can give us some pointers on how we can arrange that.)

What a shame the Saint didn't outgrow this phase - she probably just didn't find the right man yet. (Or perhaps you are not gay because you haven't found the right man yet. Yeah - it sounds equally ridiculous when you say it, fucktard. I often wonder how you don't trip over your knuckles when you're walking.)

To be fair, those who shared these stories with us completely shut down the naysayers in a much more positive and informative way, one that left the haters very quiet and embarrassed. For that, I am eternally grateful as that is the only way we will all be equal one day. But haters be warned: hold your tongues or guard your throat when you're I am near.

When the willfully ignorant spew hatred, I have a penchant for punching them under their chins....


- The 2nd Mommy